Charlie (my SSL) called me last night and told me she spoke with her attorney regarding our insurance saying that surrogacy is "excluded" and he looked over our entire policy and he said that nowhere in it did it say anything of that nature. He said that insurance companies always say no first. So his advice was to wait until I am pregnant and then have my regular OB file the insurance as a normal pregnancy and if they deny it, he will then write a letter to them demanding that they show proof in our policy of the "exclusion" and if they can't they will be forced to pay their part (80%)
I really hope that this will all blow over and bro and SSL will not be forced to pay for everything out of pocket. We will see :)
Friday, April 29, 2011
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
The cost just went way up....
I went to see my regular OB today to have my IUD removed so I could get back on a normal cycle. It went really well and he was really positive about me doing this for my bro and SSL. He said that I would be at a higher risk for high BP and toxemia because this would be like a first pregnancy. He said that when a woman gets pregnant the first time by her husband the fetus is partly foreign genetic material (because it is half her husband) and that is why some women's bodies respond with higher BP, etc. Then with subsequent pregnancies (by the same father) you don't have as high of risk because your body is used to the "foreign" genetic material. But since this baby with be an adopted embryo the risk is higher. (It would be the same for a woman that had children with different fathers) I hope that all made sense!?!?! I told him I wasn't that worried because I never had one symptom like that when I was pregnant with my oldest daughter and my BP is usually low.
After I got home I received a call from the fertility clinic we are using and they had called my insurance to see if they would cover any of their services and she said they told her that my policy doesn't cover anything AND that it includes a "surrogacy exclusion" so that there will be no maternity benefits if the baby is adopted within 90 days of birth. What!!! I had not expected that...I looked through my entire policy packet and I did not find anything stating that and I was also surprised to find that my policy would cover maternity benefits for us (my husband & I) to use a surrogate for our children. This entire process just got a lot more expensive for my bro & SSL. I feel so bad that I can't fix this... I looked at my insurance documents from when I had my last son and added up the full cost of the pregnancy and birth and it totalled more that $13,000.
I called my SSL and she said that God would provide and that made me so happy to hear her faithfulness. I struggle with faith in financial situations and it was a testament to know that she knows who is in control of this situation. This baby is going to be so blessed to have such a wonderful christian mother! AMEN
After I got home I received a call from the fertility clinic we are using and they had called my insurance to see if they would cover any of their services and she said they told her that my policy doesn't cover anything AND that it includes a "surrogacy exclusion" so that there will be no maternity benefits if the baby is adopted within 90 days of birth. What!!! I had not expected that...I looked through my entire policy packet and I did not find anything stating that and I was also surprised to find that my policy would cover maternity benefits for us (my husband & I) to use a surrogate for our children. This entire process just got a lot more expensive for my bro & SSL. I feel so bad that I can't fix this... I looked at my insurance documents from when I had my last son and added up the full cost of the pregnancy and birth and it totalled more that $13,000.
I called my SSL and she said that God would provide and that made me so happy to hear her faithfulness. I struggle with faith in financial situations and it was a testament to know that she knows who is in control of this situation. This baby is going to be so blessed to have such a wonderful christian mother! AMEN
Monday, April 25, 2011
Doctor's Appointments
My brother called my on Friday and asked me to call the fertility clinic to schedule my first appointment and a saline sonogram for Friday May 26th. (the day we will be in town for the big home study interview) So I called and told them our situation and told them the social worker who had referred us. The receptionist was very nice, but she informed me that the only thing they could schedule was the initial consultation with the doc and I could not have the sono because it had to be on a certain day of my cycle and since I still haven't had my IUD removed we don't know my cycle days yet. (I don't have a period on this particular IUD)
We will about 4 hours from the clinic we will be using for the transfer so I was very bummed. I was hoping to get the home study interview done and this sono done on with this visit. But it looks like I will be going back up on another day in June. I went ahead and scheduled an appt with my regular OB to have my IUD removed so I could at least get back on a regular cycle so we could at least schedule it the day I was there. (Now I have to schedule my husband for a vasectomy, he is soodreading excited about it.)
I also received a phone call from the receptionist later this morning telling me that they would call to pre-certify my insurance for the consultation and that 99% of insurance policies have a surrogacy exclusion so all of the fees would be out of pocket. I was devastated! I had read my entire policy and there is nothing in is that says it excludes surrogacy. I am hoping and praying that they are wrong, but I assume that they have dealt with this before and know more about it than I do. I emailed my SSL and told her what I know so she is going to call her attorney (who has a copy of my policy) to see if what they said it right. This option may have just gotten a lot more expensive :(
We will about 4 hours from the clinic we will be using for the transfer so I was very bummed. I was hoping to get the home study interview done and this sono done on with this visit. But it looks like I will be going back up on another day in June. I went ahead and scheduled an appt with my regular OB to have my IUD removed so I could at least get back on a regular cycle so we could at least schedule it the day I was there. (Now I have to schedule my husband for a vasectomy, he is soo
I also received a phone call from the receptionist later this morning telling me that they would call to pre-certify my insurance for the consultation and that 99% of insurance policies have a surrogacy exclusion so all of the fees would be out of pocket. I was devastated! I had read my entire policy and there is nothing in is that says it excludes surrogacy. I am hoping and praying that they are wrong, but I assume that they have dealt with this before and know more about it than I do. I emailed my SSL and told her what I know so she is going to call her attorney (who has a copy of my policy) to see if what they said it right. This option may have just gotten a lot more expensive :(
Here goes nothing!
My name is Julie and I am starting a new adventure. I am going to be a surrogate for my brother and sis-in-law to their adopted embryos. Sometimes I wonder how this all got started and my only explaination is GOD!
I guess I should start from the beginning:
About 4 months ago I was reading my usual blogs and started looking at the lists of other blogs on the side of the screen and one of them said something about embryo adoption. I was intrigued so I clicked it. Little did I know what I was getting myself into. I read about a family that had been struggling with infertility for many years and how they had been blessed with the gift of embryo adoption and now have a beautiful baby. I immediatly thought, "this could be for BRO and SIL". My brother and sister-in-law had been trying to conceive since they were married in 2001. They had been through multiple fertility treatments including IUIs and clomid, but have never been blessed with a pregnancy. They then tried the route of traditional domestic adoption. They went through the same attorney and agency my cousin had used to adopt his son. They were matched and were only a few months away from their baby girl's birth when the adoptive mother requested more money that they were not able to give because they had tapped out their entire savings. Then my sister-in-law was forced to have a hysterectomy due to endometriosis. My entire family was devastated by their struggles. I have 3 beautiful children of my own and wanted them to know the joy of being a parent sooo much.
So, after doing some googling and reading about embryo adoption I talked to my husband to see what he thought about me offering to be a surrogate. He thought is would be okay. I wanted to call them right away and propose this to them, but I was hesitant because I was unsure how to say it. So I kind of put it on the back burner until I saw them again.
Three months later my uncle passed away suddenly and my brother and sis-in-law came for the week of the funeral. We were on our way to plan all of the funeral arrangements and it was just us three in the car and I asked them if they had ever heard of embryo adoption. SIL said she had researched it and thought it was very expensive and they were not prusuing anything right now because they didn't have the funds. BRO had never even heard of it. I told them I was willing to be their surrogate if they ever changed their minds.
Here is where God comes in. The next day my grandmother learned that my uncle had left her a large amount of money. That night she came to my brother and SSL and told them she wanted to give it to them so they could pursue another adoption! Wow, God is so faithful. That night SIL did a ton of research and found out I was right, that EA was econimical compared to other forms of adoption and learned that the home study they had from their previous failed adoption would just need to be updated.
The next day after the funeral, they came to me and told me about the gift and asked if I was serious. I said absolutely!!! They are now in the process of updating their home study and it looks like it should be finished by the end of June.
I have done some major blog reading the last couple of months and feel like I am better prepared for what to expect and am ready to start this new journey. I hope to continue to blog this journey, but am not ready to tell very many people in my "real life" So if you know me in real life, please keep this to yourself and off facebook.
I guess I should start from the beginning:
About 4 months ago I was reading my usual blogs and started looking at the lists of other blogs on the side of the screen and one of them said something about embryo adoption. I was intrigued so I clicked it. Little did I know what I was getting myself into. I read about a family that had been struggling with infertility for many years and how they had been blessed with the gift of embryo adoption and now have a beautiful baby. I immediatly thought, "this could be for BRO and SIL". My brother and sister-in-law had been trying to conceive since they were married in 2001. They had been through multiple fertility treatments including IUIs and clomid, but have never been blessed with a pregnancy. They then tried the route of traditional domestic adoption. They went through the same attorney and agency my cousin had used to adopt his son. They were matched and were only a few months away from their baby girl's birth when the adoptive mother requested more money that they were not able to give because they had tapped out their entire savings. Then my sister-in-law was forced to have a hysterectomy due to endometriosis. My entire family was devastated by their struggles. I have 3 beautiful children of my own and wanted them to know the joy of being a parent sooo much.
So, after doing some googling and reading about embryo adoption I talked to my husband to see what he thought about me offering to be a surrogate. He thought is would be okay. I wanted to call them right away and propose this to them, but I was hesitant because I was unsure how to say it. So I kind of put it on the back burner until I saw them again.
Three months later my uncle passed away suddenly and my brother and sis-in-law came for the week of the funeral. We were on our way to plan all of the funeral arrangements and it was just us three in the car and I asked them if they had ever heard of embryo adoption. SIL said she had researched it and thought it was very expensive and they were not prusuing anything right now because they didn't have the funds. BRO had never even heard of it. I told them I was willing to be their surrogate if they ever changed their minds.
Here is where God comes in. The next day my grandmother learned that my uncle had left her a large amount of money. That night she came to my brother and SSL and told them she wanted to give it to them so they could pursue another adoption! Wow, God is so faithful. That night SIL did a ton of research and found out I was right, that EA was econimical compared to other forms of adoption and learned that the home study they had from their previous failed adoption would just need to be updated.
The next day after the funeral, they came to me and told me about the gift and asked if I was serious. I said absolutely!!! They are now in the process of updating their home study and it looks like it should be finished by the end of June.
I have done some major blog reading the last couple of months and feel like I am better prepared for what to expect and am ready to start this new journey. I hope to continue to blog this journey, but am not ready to tell very many people in my "real life" So if you know me in real life, please keep this to yourself and off facebook.
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